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Manage me? ♥

Wednesday, October 6, 2010 ♥
♥ 7:50 PM

I'm tired of this life, really I'm. It's the same shit every single day. But its more then that, it's the emotional level.
Even though this might sound weird what I'm about to say but it's true; I'm the realest fake person ever.
I'm fake to everyone I call "Close/best friend" I don't talk shit about them, talk behind their back, make up excuses not to hang out with them.. I don't do none of that. But I'm not honest with them either, I give fake advice because I think it's what they want to hear, I never explain or tell them what's really happening in my life, I never speak my mind around them but instead I say things that I think won't make them give me reaction, I try and be enthusiastic about stuff but in reality I'm usually completely bored.
 
But I can't help it; I'm different from all my friends and I mean all of them. I smoke, do drugs daily, drink on occasion. I don't talk about my personal life, nor do I hardly have the same interest/style as them. When I'm around my usual "group" I honestly feel like I don't belong there at all.. and sad thing is; I don't mind. I really don't care that I'm the outcast of my group. Because one day, no matter how mean and harsh this sounds.. I hope to separate from them.. gain friends who I can relate to.

In all honesty, I want to find a cute white boy to become my best friend. One who likes the same music I do, has around the same style, and likes to part his hair the same way. I want it too seem like we're dating because we hug all the time, hold each other and are never apart.. but we both know we're not dating one another.. but secretly want to because it would be love and nothing less. A boy friend who can come over all the time and just play video games with me or watch my favorite movie then watch his. Where we can go to a gamer convention and have the time of our life. Who I can text and just say "Wanna go on a walk with me? <3" And all we'll do is walk side by side talking about absolutely nothing, but to us it's the most important thing in the world. Someone who I can pour my heart into, and he can do the same. And I know he'll understand me, not just try and give me false advice. A guy who I can go to a concert with and sing my heart out and not be embarrassed because I know he's doing the same thing right beside me. Someone who will hold me when I cry, and during a movie or song I can tell him all of my favorite parts.. even though I've told him a billion times. And someone who isn't afraid to dance with me in public, act silly, or make a fool of themselves. When other people are asking me "What's wrong" he won't have to, because I'll tell him as soon as something happens. He can look at me, and know something is wrong.. but will be the reason that I smile again.
I want someone who gets me, and not the person I pretend to be.




Melany Ann ♥
The pirate


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Get to know me!
♥

I simply adore Jack Barakat and All Time Low <3
I refrigerate my deodorant.
I'm a vegetarian!
I enjoy funny things.
I love my cat a little to much.
I've filled my iPod and need more room!
I don't like drama.
I do like Reese's Pieces.
I love retro cartoon characters <3
If there's nothing to do, I'm totally down for doing something random.
I love photography.
I can only snap if my hands are wet.
I've started every line with the letter "I" on purpose.
Igloo (That was for fun)
I love to meet new people.
If you don't know me, lets talk!
All mine!
<3

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